This is the person I refer to here as Baby:
But it’s clear that she’s just not a baby anymore. She’s a toddler, sometimes even a little girl. Look at her, comfortable in her chair, eating an apple all by herself, saying “cheese” for the camera. That’s just not very infantile.
In Real Life she goes by “Baby N__a.” New acquaintances try to call her just “N__a” but they soon see that they are in the minority there and cave to the peer pressure. For her first six months or so she just went by “Baby” and sometimes we still call her that. Calling her “Baby N__a” was a conscious move towards using her given name, and I would like to call her just by her first name, perhaps even by her first and middle names, as that’s a nice Southern tradition, at some point.
In this space, however, the name “Baby” feels right still since that is part of what we call her, but then to those of you outside looking in, it might seem too stylized or self-consciously anonymous (I’m just guessing–maybe not). And when I see pictures like that one, well, “Baby” just doesn’t fit.
So what to call her here? Here are some prospects:
Cutie McCuterson (too hard to type, but oh so true)
Princess (bad connotations, but I do call her that)
N (her initial; maybe, but boring)
Toddler (to continue with the theme)
Daughter (goes with Husband, but I still get freaked out saying I have a daughter–that just seems so grown up)
Her actual name (but I just don’t feel totally comfortable with that)
Naomi (the name I wanted to name her but apparently it’s difficult to pronounce in Swedish; also I think if I used it here I would feel bad that we never named her that, since I picked that name out when I was 13 and I’m still a little unhappy we didn’t use it, and maybe that’s why I’ve had all this ambivalence in Real Life about using Baby’s real name)
Or something else? What do you think? How have you handled this?
28 May 2008 at 9:36 pm
As you know, my blog is public to family/friends, so we use real names. Though when I see people google our 4 names to find the blog it freaks me out a bit (even though I know it’s usually friends who forgot URL).
You could do something like CM, for cutie mccuterson (Okay, I just remembered what CM referred to during TTC days, so maybe not!).
You could do TN, for Toddler N__a. But that doesn’t sound very cute.
You could use her or your middle name.
I know, not really helping!
Oh, unrelated, the other day I realized I sometimes say to J&S, “well done!” which answers your question WAY BACK about how to give them praise without saying “good job” or “good work.” Which maybe someone suggested back then but I’m too lazy to check.
28 May 2008 at 11:42 pm
I Just use her first name…. I started out using just hubby’s first initial but Kya is also a K so that got thrown out the window!
29 May 2008 at 9:46 am
I use the nickname I gave her in utero–on an early ultrasound there was a funny angle that made the baby look like Bat Boy, so I started using that, then when the sex was revealed, revised to Bat Girl.
Go with whatever feels most natural to you!
29 May 2008 at 11:43 am
Who says you can’t stick with Baby? She’ll always be your baby no matter her age, right?
29 May 2008 at 12:31 pm
I thought you used her real name on your blog. I knew you called her “baby,” but I didn’t know that you didn’t reveal that her name was N__a.
As you know, I use code names for both of my babies. I suggest using something that doesn’t start with the letter N. I am always accidentally using Izzy’s real name, because his code name and his real name both begin with an I.
30 May 2008 at 7:22 am
Interesting…you know, at a recent gathering, you actually corrected someone when they only used her first name, emphasizing the BABY part! I have to agree with you that she is, in fact, no longer a baby- she looks remarkably long and lean in the picture, which suggests to me that she has already made that leap, regardless of what you call her. I’m with Claudia though, that she will always be your baby! I still use “baby” for my 4-year old, but more as a term of endearment than anything else.
As to this forum, I’d go with the first letter, since it’s really easy to slip up if you want to keep her name on the DL. You may want to warn those of your readers that already know her name and have used it in past comments, though. OR make up something completely different, maybe based on something she likes to do, or a quality of hers? Good luck!
30 May 2008 at 8:37 am
Yes, people have used her real name in the comments, but since I don’t think those show up on searches I think it’s okay. Plus, it’s not like her name is top secret or I wouldn’t tell anyone at all.
I guess I’ll continue to use Baby for now but will start trying out other things that feel fitting.
My middle name certainly wouldn’t do since it’s my extremely rare maiden name, and her middle name is a family name and kinda boring. Toddler seems reasonable but then she’d grow out of that, too. Maybe “offspring” though that strikes me as too ironically nonspecific or something. As for what she likes to do or some quality of hers, well…maybe something like Little Likes to Swing, or Miss Crazy about Animals, or Silly Button.
Hm. Will have to give this more thought.
30 May 2008 at 8:55 am
I’d refer to my son as Gray (which is so not his real name) if I ever talked about him. But since I don’t, it’s kind of a moot point.
1 June 2008 at 8:08 pm
I use the initial thing.
And, BTW, comments totally show up in searches. It one of the reasons for some of the wackiest google searches I get.
11 June 2008 at 12:51 pm
That you call her “Baby” makes me think of the movie Dirty Dancing, since the female lead character’s nickname was Baby in that movie, and makes me wonder if her fictional family in her fictional past called her that to start and never changed it.