People go on about the specialness of the nursing relationship, but that’s not something I worry about. We never enjoyed nursing but she loves cuddling close and taking her bottle and I feel it’s just the same emotionally/psychologically for her. Well, enough so, anyway.
My grandmother told me in the first weeks after the baby born and we were struggling so much that the baby doesn’t care what it’s eating or how as long as it gets to be close to you, so to try to think of it that way. And that helps.
But what I do worry about is how the pumping takes me away from Baby. I mostly try to do it when she’s asleep or someone else has her but sometimes she has to entertain herself, which I guess I’m glad she is learning how to do, at least. She sits in her swing and looks at and touches and mouths her toys sometimes just long enough for me to pump (10-15 minutes, usually). Sometimes the mobile will sustain her.
But the worst is when I have to do it and she’s NOT content on her own and I CAN’T make her happy at arm’s length while she’s in the Boppy (early days) or (nowadays) the Bumbo seat. A baby alone and inconsolable and I’m ignoring her–that’s not what I wanted. But you do what you can.
